BIG TEST WITH EID Al-ADHA

So, I've been watching some videos on Youtube channels that address on how to cope with hypothalamic amenorrhea lately, and most of them are made by (guess what?!) vegan communities. Probably the reason is that this disorder mainly affects them!

They motivate me to increase my fat intake and care less about the notion of food so that I can focus on life, which is a really big part of my recovery process.

I used to be a girl who would make her grades and extracurricular activities and ambition. I would compare myself with others based on the number of countries I saw and how much I knew about the world apart from the lessons that we learned together. I would never compare myself to the others based on the things that they eat daily, or the number that appears once they step on the scale.

I'm not saying that comparing myself with others in any kind of aspects is a good thing.

But it is a normal thing. It's part of who I am, a part of who we are.

People compare themselves with each other, to measure if they are improving or getting worse.

But there is a healthy limit on comparing oneself to another.

I might have crossed that line during my illness.

So yeah, I've been trying to recover from my recent obsessions about food and focus more on my former hobbies and interests. I think I've come a long way in succeeding that so far.

However, these channels are full of the idea of "saving the animals!". Not a bad thing as it sounds, I know. But when it comes to a point where you get stressed out once your close relatives put an animal meat on your plate (since it's the time of feast of Sacrifices) and you feel like you're going to die if you eat it, I think it signals to a PROBLEM.

Personally, I don't like meat. The only animal products my brain and stomach can tolerate are eggs, milk and fish. And if I ever start living on my own, the first thing I'm going to cross out from my groceries list is "meat." However, I'm also an easy-going person who used to be able to "adapt" to her living conditions. If eating meat is going to improve my relationship with my loved ones, so be it! I ACCEPT THE CHALLANGE!

Take care ;)